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Recording of “Mommy ‘Me Time’ Ideas”, read by Nicole Busacker.
I find it ironic that many things that help you thrive as a mom are often the most difficult to obtain. A full night’s rest, a well-balanced diet, exercise, and time to yourself. In other words, it is difficult to meet your own needs while caring for a little human being (or more).
I understand that mommy “me time” is often one of the things moms want the most yet are never able to get enough of. I want to share a few “me time” ideas for moms along with ways to make alone time feel more obtainable and do-able.
There is a lot of chaos that comes with being a mom. When you have alone time, you are better able to enjoy being with your kids and your husband, think clearly, and be calm in the tough moments.
I understand it is easy to feel guilty for leaving your kids to do something for yourself. However, when you care for yourself and meet your own needs, you will be a better mom to your kids and wife to your husband.
It can be tricky taking the first steps to make time for yourself. Here are a few tips that can get you moving toward getting the mommy “me time” you need.
Talk to your husband about your need for alone time.
Plan a time together that works with both of your schedules that is consistent. (Once a week, twice a week, 15 minutes every day, etc.)
Keep your appointment with yourself. Treat your alone time as an appointment with a doctor or a friend. Being strict and continually keeping your “me time” appointment will help it become a more normal and natural part of your life and your family’s life.
Be flexible. While you do need to be consistent, take note when life changes and when your alone time needs to change. If something doesn’t work for you or your family, be willing to adjust and have your mommy “me time” at a different time.
When to Have Mommy “Me Time”
It can be tricky to figure out when to have your mommy “me time,” regardless of how old your child(ren) are. Below are a few suggestions that can help you get ideas of when to have your “me time”.
Keep in mind that there may be interruptions during some of these times and you will need to be patient and flexible. Pick a time that is the least stressful to you and when you can do a mommy “me time” activity you will enjoy.
Here are a few prime times I’ve found that are great for my alone time:
Before the kids wake up. Even if it is just half an hour before, having a moment to yourself before the children wake up and need everything can be a mental lifesaver for you.
During the kid’s nap time or quiet time. Nap time was not just meant for kids, but for weary moms too! If they are too old to nap, establish a quiet-time routine where they play or read by themselves for 30 minutes to an hour.
After the kids go to bed at night. If you are a night owl, this may be the best time to do something fun or relaxing.
On the weekend for a couple hours. The weekend often carries a little more flexibility, so this can be a good time to go on longer mommy “me time” excursions away from the house or hang out with friends.
When a babysitter is available. If you know when the babysitter is available, then ask them to babysit even if you don’t have specific plans yet. Once you have a babysitter, it will be easier to plan a “me time” activity.
When your husband can watch the kids. Of course, your husband can always be a good option for your alone time! The kids need chances to bond with him as much as they do with you. So leaving the kids with dad can be beneficial for the whole family!
“Me Time” Ideas for Moms
Whatever you do for your mommy “me time”, make sure it’s something that will help you feel renewed and happy when you are done. You don’t want to finish the activity feeling more exhausted and stressed than before. You want to feel rejuvenated and ready to get back into motherhood!
Exercising is a mommy “me time” activity that makes a huge difference in the rest of my day.
I often don’t have a lot of time to exercise, so I will often do short but intense workouts. Even just 10 minutes of getting my heart rate up will help me to have a clearer head and more energy to mother my children.
I typically find that working out before the kids wake up works best for me. But you can also exercise after they go to sleep at night or even while they are awake. I like to run while pushing my two toddlers in a double stroller or bike while I pull them in a trailer.
Spending time with God is one of the most effective “me time” ideas for moms that you could choose. When you spend time with your Father in Heaven, you have the opportunity to call on Him for whatever strength or charity you lack as a mother.
When you pray, study the scriptures, and attend a Temple, Church, or other house of worship, you are able to better connect with God and His divinity that lives within you.
Motherhood is hard, and you need the power of God to guide you, comfort you, and give you the qualities you need to be a good mom.
But behold, I say unto you that ye must pray always, and not faint; that ye must not perform any thing unto the Lord save in the first place ye shall pray unto the Father in the name of Christ, that he will consecrate thy performance unto thee, that thy performance may be for the welfare of thy soul.
Writing down your thoughts, feelings, and experiences as you mother your kids can be so therapeutic and relaxing. And you don’t need to take half an hour to write non-stop in order for this to be an effective mommy “me time” activity.
I typically write in my journal before bed right before I kneel down to pray. It is a quiet time and it has become part of my nightly routine so I’m less likely to forget.
When I write in my journal, it could be a one page, one paragraph, or even one sentence. While I try to be honest about how life is going, I also focus on the good. I take journaling as an opportunity to remember what brought me joy that day: my girl’s laugh, my baby walking, my kids playing together, knowing just what to do at the right time, etc.
When I remember and write down the good that’s happening in my life, I feel overall more happy and confident that God is with me.
I love to blog (which is probably obvious) and it has become a regular part of my life. I choose to blog as a part of my weekly “me time” that I arranged with my husband. It brings me so much joy to create something that will help others and learn as I go.
You might also enjoy doing crafts, writing poetry or novels, making activities for kids, knitting or crocheting, or refurnishing furniture! Ashlee Gadd, author of Create Anyway, states there is no shame in spending a little time and money on something that will bring you joy and make you a better mom. (You can check out her inspiring book here.)
Laying down on a comfortable spot and closing your eyes (whether you fall asleep or not) can help you de-stress and calm down after an overstimulating morning or afternoon with kids. Even just a couple minutes of shut-eye and relaxing can help you be a more calm and present mom.
I typically will lay down for 5-10 minutes after I put my girls down for their nap/quiet time. This guarantees that I have some rest, rather than waiting until the dishes are done, the laundry is folded, and the girls inevitably wake up.
Sometimes I meditate while I lay down, sometimes I let my mind be blank, and other times I end up getting a 30 minute nap I didn’t know I needed.
When I take just a few minutes of my day to lay in silence, I have much more energy for the rest of the day and think more clearly.
Take one night a week (or whatever meets your needs) to let your husband put the kids to bed and have alone time. Say good night to the kiddos before the bedtime routine starts, then leave the house, go in your room with the door locked, go to the back yard, etc.
This is a simple and easy way to get a little “me time”, and can even be used when it has been an especially overstimulating day. Just be sure to take your husband’s needs into consideration as well.
Do you hair, get your nails done, or take a relaxing bath. Anything that will help you feel beautiful, clean, and relaxed.
And you don’t have to go to a salon (unless you really want to). If it’s easier for you, do your nails at home or take the time to curl your hair or cut it (if you have the skills).
Get together with some of your girl friends and go out to eat, go window shopping, or just sit on the couch and chat.
I attend a book club once a month with some friends and it is one of my favorite “me time” ideas for moms. I get to relax, eat good food, and chat with other young moms who are experiencing life similar to mine.
I thoroughly enjoy listening to books and podcasts while the girls are asleep or while we are driving. I get to escape into another world or be inspired before I get back into taking care of my precious little children.
Listening to music is a great way to spend mommy “me time” if you need a fast way to destress. Music can trigger dopamine, or the happy hormone, and who doesn’t want that?! Sing to the lyrics, dance, and have a good time!
Cleaning during your alone time may or may not be your thing. If it makes you cringe just thinking about it, then don’t spend your mommy “me time” cleaning.
However, it may bring you joy to clean while children are fast asleep and there are no additional messes being made. I sometimes will clean during my alone time and listen to a book or music, which makes it more enjoyable.
If cleaning without interruption will help you feel rejuvenated and ready to go back to motherhood, then go for it!
Dads Need Alone Time Too!
And last but certainly not least, let’s not forget about our partners in parenting – dads need a breather too!
Just as you thrive with a moment of peace, so does your hubby. So, be sure to schedule some “me time” for him as well. Trust me, it’ll work wonders for his presence as a dad and partner in crime.
Now that you have your own “me time” ideas for moms, pick an activity and schedule a time to do it! You may need coordinate with your husband and be flexible, but help him know how important it is to you.
Once you have regular mommy “me time”, you will feel the difference it can make for you every day. You will be happier, less stressed, and able to enjoy motherhood and marriage more.
